The Alternative Angler

Never mind smelling the flowers, don’t forget to take time out to see the satirical side of fishing life and grab a laugh along the way as well. So here’s a regular column from Kevin Perkins to remind us that life is for laughing at, or taking the p*** out of, whenever we can.

TickleTackle is a new and exciting concept for anglers. We all realise that many useful items are developed by anglers for anglers, but are not considered worthy of production by major tackle companies. We take those ideas and present them directly to those anglers who we consider to be experts. We blend sometimes diverse technologies in an effort to ‘push the envelope’ and give you what you deserve – more time fishing, with better designed equipment.

New ideas and strategies are coming on-stream all the time, so be sure to look out for regular updates. In the meantime, please read on to see just a small selection of the fabulous products currently on trial or under development:

An ever-growing range of products, which fall into the category of ”why didn’t I think of that?” Items, which you may have not thought were available, and items that you didn’t even know you wanted:

Tickle Tackle plc

You will be pleased to hear that the fishermen’s friend – TickleTackle plc, have continued to identify niche markets in the angling world. They are proud to announce that have just been appointed sole UK agents for Fux quality accessories. Here is a preview of yet more fabulous items which are not yet readily available in the shops, but can be brought now by visiting www.tickleandfux.com.

Fux Run’n’Stun

Developed in absolute secrecy for pike anglers, this is the breakthrough you have been waiting for. At last, an opportunity to fish both live and deadbait methods with the same bait. Simply apply a measured dose of ‘Run’n’Stun’ to your livebaits and fish them in the normal way. After a pre-determined time (regulated by the dosage) the fish become comatose, and sink to the bottom, so you can switch to deadbaiting without having to re-cast or re-bait. After a few hours of this the fish will regain consciousness, and you go back to livebaiting! If you can obtain live sea-fish, could be used to great effect in the Lake District. So simple and so effective, why didn’t anyone think of it before? Just stunning!

Carpet Bomba

Getting tennis elbow from your throwing stick? Can’t always find a mains socket to recharge your baitboat batteries? You need the Carpet-Bomba system. Based on the centuries old, but highly effective Roman ballista, the 14ft telescopic throwing arm has interchangeable buckets of up to 25 kilos in capacity, and has a range in excess of 200 yards. Guaranteed to put all your boilies in one spot in one go. System is only available on a rental basis, and you will need a towing hitch on your car. Warning – this is most definitely not a toy. On no account must you use the Carpet-Bomba to deliver lager supplies to your mate on the other side of the lake.

Big Boy Bivvy

Cramped in your current bivvy? Nowhere for you to put all your gear? No room to entertain if friends drop round? Then you need a ‘Big Boy Bivvy’. This is yet another ‘must have’ for 2003. A two-storey bivvy with sleeping accommodation upstairs, a ladder accesses the first floor, (stair lift is optional) while the reinforced brass effect centre pole is used for rapid descent, in fireman style. Various accessories are available, including double glazed dormer windows so you can enjoy the view from your elevated position. The secluded upstairs area is ideal for storing the next item listed, away from prying eyes!

Fux Bivvy-Mate

Long, lonely nights away from your loved ones can bring on feelings that you may find hard to suppress. Find relief with new Fux Bivvy-Mate, your inflatable, ever accommodating friend. She comes with up-to-the-minute ‘Really Twee’ camouflage lingerie, and Velcro straps for firm attachment to your bedchair (please state four of six legged type – the bedchair of course, not the Bivvy Mate!).

Also available in Deluxe version with Betalight slots in the appropriate places. Both versions can be turned inside out (for emptying) and convert into a handy inflatable unhooking mat. Flesh coloured puncture kit available.

FuxKit

Brand new concepts, and all are affordable, essential items of tackle, each one designed by anglers for anglers.

Specimen hunters – Don’t you wish you could have seats like the match boys do, with endless bolt-on accessories to make life that little bit easier? Well the FuxKit ‘Sit on It ‘ range could be just for you.

Easy-Out 1 & Easy-Out 2
Spring loaded carbon/titanium composite plate that gets you up out of your chair in a flash. Easy-Out 1 is primed and then manually operated.

Crash landing during field testing of the Easy-Out prototype

Foot-Fux
Fully adjustable magnesium and graphite foot rests, with universal fitting. Ensures your feet are in the correct launch position if using Easy-Out system.

Ev-R-Lev-L
Clip on spirit level to ensure that your chair is at exactly the right attitude. Can also be used to check rod pods, bobbins, monkey climbers, etc, etc. Comes as standard with Easy-Out 2.

Sun-Gone
Green and white striped awning fits over top of chair, also available with clip on mosquito net. (Cannot be used with either Easy-Out system, for obvious reasons)

Handee-Bolt-ons
A growing range of bolt-on accessories with various different applications. Some are simple spring loaded clamps to hold things whilst you are busy, others fulfil specific tasks, such as cup-holders, can openers, spectacle rests, aspirin dispensers, tea tray, etc, etc. Many more exciting products are in the development and prototype stage

Don’t forget to keep a sharp lookout for more TickleTackle/Fux products in the future. These are forward thinking companies who know what anglers want before they do!