| KEVIN PERKINS | |
Never mind smelling the flowers, don’t forget to take time out to see the satirical side of fishing life and grab a laugh along the way as well. So here’s a regular column from Kevin Perkins to remind us that life is for laughing at, or taking the p*** out of, whenever we can. |
News PeruseA sideways look at some of the recent news stories that have involved fishingSurfin’ the Tsunami A NEWSPAPER REPORT on the new sport of ‘Lock Surfing’ caught my eye. It appears that youngsters (bored, with nothing to do, no provision made for them by local councils, it’s not their fault, etc, etc) in the North West, have taken up opening canal lock gates, and are ‘surfing’ on the resultant wave as it sweeps down the canal. A spokesperson said that these youngsters are putting themselves in grave peril by practising this highly dangerous act, although, that sounds to me like said spokesperson had probably realised that no Risk Assessment had been carried out identifying this hazard. And with no warning signs in place advising the public not to illegally open gates and chuck themselves into the resultant raging torrent, claims for compensation would arise for any injury caused. I’d like to think I am joking, but I feel that may not be the case….. Anyway, apart from all that, the spokesperson said this Lock Surfing business was causing local boat owners and anglers a lot of trouble and inconvenience. Well, I’m really not to fussed if some weekend admiral’s pride and joy bobbed up and down a bit and the Gordon’s got spilt on the poop deck, or wherever, but you have to feel for those poor anglers. A tidal wave comes down the canal, and what do you do? As you were almost certainly pole fishing at the time, possibly in a match, you probably didn’t have your ‘Tsunami’ rod set up, and so were unable to make the most of the prevailing conditions. A barbel floodwater rod might have done at a pinch, although you may find yourself under-gunned if that’s all you have. There is obviously a new niche here for a stepped up version that will handle say, the two pounds of lead that you will need to hold the bottom in these conditions. As well as Tsunami rods, expect camou coated, super sized Breakaway leads, and those who insist on natural looking weights will be relieved to know that Slabz’ will be on the market soon, in standard grey, natural sandstone and Cotswold riven pattern to start with. And it might be an idea to invest in an up-rated trolley if you intend lugging these new weights around. Polishing off the Carp I see the Daily Mail ran a story on our newly acquired Polish friends and their propensity for munching their way through our precious carp stocks. Richard Lee was mentioned in despatches, as editor of Angling Times (the angler’s weekly ‘bible’ we are told) and reference was made to the £ 10,000 reward for those caught perpetrating this heinous crime. The EA did the usual bit of fence sitting, saying that fish removal was a matter for local club, although anyone taking fish without a licence would be guilty of theft. Hmmm…… I would have thought that anyone fishing without a licence was guilty of just that, fishing without a licence, let alone removing fish, although the chances of them getting caught is minimal, to say the least, unless they organised and advertised a 100 pegger fish-taking match in the AT, then the EA would be swarming around them en masse, I’ve no doubt. The Mail did balance the story with some comments from a Mr Janaszewski, a Polish culinary expert (their title, not mine!) who likened their eating carp at Christmas as being the same as us Brits eating turkey. He claims that carp are a delicacy, although in his opinion they taste like mud. If eating mud is considered a delicacy in Poland, then the rest of their culinary delights are to be wondered at! Just to round off the article, we were given not one, but two recipes for carp, so that those who may not thought of eating them yet might just be tempted to try. The first is a delicious sounding concoction of carp and shredded beetroot with a white wine sauce, and the second is a carp stew with garlic, carrots, onions and raisins, I can see a big steaming pan full of that going down a treat with the bivvy boys! But joking aside, is there not a case for farmed carp for the table to legally supply this obviously growing need and, if so, should it matter to anglers? How about put and take carp lakes, run on the same lines as current trout fisheries, where our Eastern European cousins can enjoy a bit of sport when fishing for their dinner? How about commercial fisheries who are having a bit of a thinning out session advertising the fact and selling off the surplus at £ 3 per pound or 20 Zlotys to the kilo or whatever. Carp as a cash crop, is that the way forward, or is it a case that while we are happy with the cows to beef scenario, the reindeer to venison situation always has people stumbling over the Bambi factor, and is it the case that sentimentality has crept in and we have become too attached to our coarse fish, particularly carp? |
