The Port and Stilton Club Honour Steve King

Richard Farrow

Senior Member
Joined
Mar 6, 2003
Messages
5,938
Reaction score
2
Location
Norfolk
Well done Steve you are a brave man fishing with that bunch of reprobates, especially 'Spiders', I hope they haven't led you astray.
 

Steve King

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 2, 2009
Messages
6,235
Reaction score
4,111
Location
Near ye village of Tardebigge!!
It was a good weekend in all, but I still don't understand the rules of PaSC matches. (Perhaps the rules are loosely based on "Mornington Crescent" but not quite as precise!)

I should have won, but some of my fish were disqualified for being perch or bream "and they don't count!" and apparently "moving your hands" whilst fishing means minus points as well!! Hmmm tying up a few rigs lost me points!!

I had planned to floatfish the Damnflkask (my spelling!!) but as I have a distinct aversion to floatfishing in heavy rain out came a feeder rod. Whilst Poshers used a canal wand as a feeder rod, the only leger/feeder rod I had with me was a barbel feeder! For this reason I figured touch legering was the best option for bite indication! I did not reveal this technique to the PaSC at the time for fear of more negative points or even disqualification!!!

I was pleased to receive his Lordship's Cup as a trophy. This priceless heirloom had been cunningly disguised as a piece of worthless tat by Lord Paul's butler cleverly attaching a "Help the Aged " sticker with a price of £2.50 to it! Further subterfuge involved disguising the cup with layers of tarnish.

I have cleaned the tarnish off, but left the sticker intact!!
 
Last edited:

Lord Paul of Sheffield

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 26, 2004
Messages
17,971
Reaction score
194
Location
Furkum Hall, Sheffield
Can I just thank Posher for taking my rough, well drunken, draft and crafting a worthy story from my words, he added more than a few of his own.

They say you can't polish a turd - but Poshers has given my brown offering a dam(pun intended) good buff up
Well done Sir.

---------- Post added at 22:25 ---------- Previous post was at 22:16 ----------

Steve -few understand the full rules - Spiders does, I do but am too drunk to follow them, Poshers does but he's too Posh to tell any one the rules and Matt knows the rules but under rulesd 47b can't tell anyone them - it's a complex ting to be sure
 

Steve King

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 2, 2009
Messages
6,235
Reaction score
4,111
Location
Near ye village of Tardebigge!!
A well written article from Lord P and Poshers (didn't know until Lord Paul's post who wrote it!) Nice one lads!!!:D:D:D

As far as sleeping whilst fishing is concerned I wish to confirm that it was not me! :wh:wh:wh
 

Specihunter

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 15, 2006
Messages
2,649
Reaction score
64
Location
Hamphire
Shame you didn't fish with corker you missed his famous loaf and packing up skills.(Just spidey and mark hewitt).
 

Steve Spiller

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 11, 2005
Messages
15,191
Reaction score
4
Location
Bristol
Excellant!
I can't wait to entertain Poshers and Spewitt......

The pressure is completely off now.......

Port and Stilton is nothing, cider and cornish pasties rules down here.

You're gonna have to play by my rules next time ;-)

If you think Spiders was strict you aint seen nothing yet!

Jake can't wait!
 
Joined
Sep 4, 2007
Messages
13,768
Reaction score
40
Location
Cheshire
A cracking write up chaps. I wish I could have been there, if only to show you how to catch quality roach in a reservoir packed full of them :).

I notice many of you struggled with the rules AGAIN!. Look, they are quite simple, but under the rules I am not allowed to fully explain them to you. I notice there was no mention of hemp. Did anyone remember to take some? Someone must ALLWAYS take hemp so that Spiders can ban it.
 

Stealph Viper

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 23, 2007
Messages
5,233
Reaction score
7
Location
Just Floating Around
A really enjoyable read, it sounds like you all had a great time, barring the weather trying to put the Damper on the proceedings.

Tight Lines :D
 
Joined
Jan 2, 2005
Messages
5,751
Reaction score
12
Location
Stockport
"reaching for an oversized chrome spoon he gathers an
intimate quantity of dried muffin remnants and brushing his scapular aside proceeds to dump these inside of his shirt..."

Having done that remember not to eat yellow snow, consider the demise of Bobbie Brown whilst savouring the potential delights of catholic girls and then journey to the City of Tiny Lights
 

Specihunter

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 15, 2006
Messages
2,649
Reaction score
64
Location
Hamphire
Excellant!
I can't wait to entertain Poshers and Spewitt......

The pressure is completely off now.......

Port and Stilton is nothing, cider and cornish pasties rules down here.

You're gonna have to play by my rules next time ;-)

If you think Spiders was strict you aint seen nothing yet!

Jake can't wait!

The pressure might be off you but it's worse for me :eek: . The thames isn't playing ball.
 

Morespiders

Senior Member
Joined
Nov 15, 2004
Messages
5,892
Reaction score
57
Location
Cheshire
Quite nearly a consise writeup, will I go again?, maybe, what irk's me on these fishins is the amount of cheating that goes on.
You wouldn't believe the things they get upto.

Just a few of the rules broken.

Mr King, kept looking up the laketo his right, not allowed, shows lack of concentration.
Casting 30yds, regulations say, further than 40yds.
Umberella at the wrong angle,again stated in the rules, must be upright.
Getting up to pee twice, only once is allowed in a 10hour match.

Mr Smith (Poshers), Fishing without due care and attention, ie, talking whilst casting.
Not knowing the way and getting us lost 3 times.
Talking to the contestant's either side of him.
Throwing stones at my umberella.
Rattling his crisp packet's, Elwin was disqualified for this last year, so he has no excuse.
Using hempseed, drugs the fish, only allowed from September onwards.

Lord Paul.
Moaning every time I took another half pint of maggots.
Coming dressed like a catalogue model, and combing his hair every five minutes.
Standing up to cast every 5 minutes, instead of the regulation 7 minutes.
Bringing the bloody monkey, when it clearly states in the rules, NO MONKEYS.

So folks you can see why i was sat down legs crossed, what the camera doesnt show is me shaking my head, in disbelief at the antics of these FM'ers.
In future anybody attending this function will have to be vetted, the aforementioned three now have a two year ban starting today, and have been sent on a four year course to learn the rules.

Why wasnt the 7lb perch I caught mentioned in your write up?
All in all it was a reasonable day, cant complain, i won again (fairly),
The cheese and wine was exellent, was an honour to meet Lady Paul, how she puts up with Lord Paul god only knows, shame about the company, of cheats and liar's

PS, If anybody would like to join, its £120 per year membership, all cheques and monies to be sent to me, The Treasurer.
 

Morespiders

Senior Member
Joined
Nov 15, 2004
Messages
5,892
Reaction score
57
Location
Cheshire
Well done to Steve for lasting the weekend.[/QUOTE]
Yes Clarke, and whats that supposed to mean.?

---------- Post added at 23:24 ---------- Previous post was at 23:24 ----------

Glad those rules weren't implace when i fished with you spidey.
They were Speci, but you didnt catch out so it ddnt matter.
 
Top