Pilgrim’s Progress

He is also a very keen angler, having come back to the sport in 1995 following a break of several years. In this regular column he will tell us about his progress as an angler – his thoughts about the sport, what he learns, the fishing trips he makes, the anguish, the humour, in fact everything he experiences as his angling career develops.

Pilgrim’s Progress – read it everyThursday!

The Tongue In Cheek Guide To Barbel Fishing

So you fancy yourself as a barbel angler then, do you? Well, letme tell you that this is a branch of fishing that is like no other.For example, it’s far superior to any other type of angling. Itrequires skill that carp anglers would never be able to develop. Itrequires an understanding of watercraft that the average carper wouldnever master in a million years. It involves stealth and patiencethat quite frankly, the average goldfish catcher would never evenunderstand.

Which brings me to my first point. To be a true barbel angler youmust understand that all other anglers are to be tolerated, butnothing else. And, there is one branch of angling that you must holdin utter contempt – carp fishing.

It is a fact, yes, a fact, that the noble art of barbel fishingattracts the more genteel amongst the angling fraternity. None ofthis yobbish culture for us. No thank you. Forget your crates ofcheap supermarket beer and endless vindaloos eaten at the bank side.To be a true barbel angler allow your palate be tickled by a niceexquisite red. Wine that is, for the uninitiated. All accompanied bya five course meal, eaten at an upmarket country restaurant that youvisit prior to your river session.

Upon arriving at the river, as you put on your Barbour jacket andfloppy hat, take a deep breath as you admire the beauty of runningwater. This is an absolutly crucial point to remember. Barbel do notbelong in any other place than a river. To utter even a suggestionthat they may thrive in a stillwater is the unforgivable sin as faras acceptance within the community of barbel anglers is concerned.Anything other than a river will result in your excommunication fromthe barbel fishing fraternity.

And of course, as you may already have gleaned, what you wear isimportant. As well as the previously mentioned Barbour, invest in agood quality waistcoat. It can be any colour as long as it is green.Matched with either olive green corduroy or camouflage trousers,you’ll really look the part. And don’t forget your sunglasses,preferably one of the more expensive fishing ones, to complete theimage. Walking along the bankside, dressed like that, with your rodand net in hand, and bait bucket in tow, you’ll be the envy of everyangler you’ll meet.

Tackle is important to us as barbel anglers. There isn’t time inan article like this to go into detail, but look for something thatis pre-fixed by the word ‘barbel’ and you’re on the right track.Barbel quiver, barbel rig wallet, barbel chair, barbel unhooking mat,barbel landing net, barbel luncheon meat. Okay, I think you get thepoint.

There will, of course, be those uneducated people within thegreater angling community that try and point out that there is nosuch thing as a barbel rig wallet, barbel chair and so on. Do nothave anything to do with them. Do not listen to them. Particularly ifthey try and tell you can buy the same item cheaper without the’barbel’ pre-fix.

However, there are certain items of tackle that you are forbiddento possess as a true barbel fisherman. You must never own a bivvie,rod pod or bite indicators, let alone fish with them whilst after themost elegant species to grace our waterways. These belong to thatinferior world that is known as carp fishing. The true barbel mandoes not need artificial aids to help him catch fish. When out thereat the riverside, you hold the rod in your hand and you feel forbites by holding the line in the other. And you don’t need a bivviebecause you won’t be staying that long in any one swim. Keeping onthe move is an important part of the game. To find out whether anangler is a true barbeler, see how long he spends in each swim. Morethan five minutes? Forget it, he’s just playing games.

Bait is important to the pursuer of barbus barbus. Gone are thedays when barbel could be caught on maggots, corn and tins ofluncheon meat from Tesco. To be successful these days you need to beusing boilies and pastes that cost an arm and a leg. And of course,it is imperative that you pre-bait the swim for at least four weeks,with two kilos per day to get the fish feeding on your bait and yourbait alone. Okay, it may be a tad expensive, but what do you wantfrom your fishing? If you’re not prepared to put time and money intoyour chosen hobby, then just go and take up gudgeon fishing on thelocal canal.

Of course, the time will come when you actually hook and land abarbel. If possible, try and get the hook out whilst the fish is inthe landing net and still in the water. Remember, we are dealing witha species that deserves and demands special treatment. Once the hookhas been removed I recommend that you jump into the river and holdthe fish head into the current until it is strong enough to swim awayof its own free will. This may take up to one hour, but that’s theprice you have to pay for catching the Ruler Of The River.

Of course, before you jump into the river, check the depth first.In the last year seven barbel anglers have drowned because theydidn’t think. The truth is they probably weren’t proper barbelanglers anyway and should have stuck to carp fishing, which was moreakin to their level of intelligence.

Another important consideration is that the true barbel anglernever fishes with more than one rod. Call us purists, old fashioned,traditionalists or whatever you will. But the fact remains, that onerod is enough. It’s okay to own more than one rod of course. In factyou will need several if you really want to become successful. One totempt Teme torpedos, one to submit Severn submarine sized specimens,another to deliver Dove doubles, then you’ll need a rod to ministerto Medway monsters. And so on and so forth.

Don’t listen to those who tell you that one or two rods will besufficient for the job. The truth is that you’ll probably need adifferent rod for every swim you fish, and definitely one forupstream legering and one for downstream legering, such is the trulyspecialised nature of barbel fishing. Alternatively, if you do decideto own one rod, as long as it’s a cane one, matched with a centrepin,that’s equally acceptable.

Of course, fishing is all about, well, fishing. Don’t be an eagerbeaver, like those so-called pleasure anglers, who just can’t wait toget their line in the water. No, be patient. To be a true pursuer ofMr Whiskers you will need to bait up several swims. Then wait. And Imean wait. Preferably about 10 hours before you cast out the baitedhook. Patience is essential if you want to join the ranks of theelite. If you don’t have what it takes I suggest you take upsomething less demanding on the old intellect. Like carp fishing.

So there you have it: the definitive guide to becoming a truebarbel angler. I hope that the sophistication of becoming a realbarbel angler hasn’t deterred you. After all, I wouldn’t like tothink that you may not possibly take up fishing for barbel and that Iwould have the whole river to myself. Oh, and by the way, just incase anyone thought I was being insensitive about the lives of theseven barbel anglers who drowned – I made that bit up.

Introducing next week’s Pilgrim’sProgress is definitely a case of deja vu. Because by the time you arereading this I will be halfway through a week long session in Suffolkafter big bream. Spurred on by my recent catch of slimies, this timeI’m going flat out for a double. My confidence is sky high, all Ineed to do is catch one. That’s the hardest bit. So, how did I geton? Join me next week when the title of the column will either be‘Big Bream Bonanza’ or ‘Big Bream Blanker’. Orsomething like that anyway.

The Reverend Stewart R Bloor
Sedgley International Christian Ministries
PO Box 1216, Dudley. DY3 1GW.
Telephone : 01384 – 828033
Web site : www.sicm.org
e-mail : missionscentre@sicm.org