| KEVIN PERKINS | |
Never mind smelling the flowers, don’t forget to take time out to see the satirical side of fishing life and grab a laugh along the way as well. So here’s a regular column from Kevin Perkins to remind us that life is for laughing at, or taking the p*** out of, whenever we can. |
EnvironMental
As I go about my work, I come across the ‘Producer Responsibility Obligations (Packaging Waste) Regulations’ in all its glory. So what? You say. Well, it is controlled by a branch of the Environment Agency, and is staffed by a selection of their fine upstanding officers.
Now in my dealings with these people, I generally find them courteous, helpful and fair minded about most issues. Strange then, that the separate arm that deals with angling is apparently not capable of a little ‘joined up’ thinking when it comes to the anachronisms that are the fishing ‘Closed Season’ and ‘Rod Licences’.
Let me ramble on about the Rod Licence first.
It lasts for twelve months
Well it doesn’t if you fish on our rivers; it lasts for only nine months, so can we have a rebate or a 25% reduction please?
It lasts for twelve months
What about if you observe the salmon and trout season of April until September. That will be a six-month rebate or 50% reduction please.
It lasts for twelve months
If you are a pike fisherman who ‘Commences Pike fishing from 1st October’ as still applies in some fisheries, it lasts six months, so where to go to apply for rebate/reduction?
It lasts for twelve months
That of course, will be the EA’s twelve months, not yours. And it begins in April, when you can’t legally fish on rivers. Having to buy a permit for something you are not allowed to do, these are the kind of scripts that comedy writers can only dream of.
It lasts for twelve months
So that means the EA can get the bulk of its funds up front. Which company or business wouldn’t mind that? A huge wedge of cash in April, and then a steady trickle through the year. Suits them fine, I’m sure. But what about the their paying customers, us anglers? Do we not deserve a bit of ‘Customer Service’?
It doesn’t apply:
To sea anglers. But just how far up an estuary can you fish before you fall foul of needing a Rod Licence and/or violating the Closed Season?
It doesn’t apply:
To dog walkers, bird watchers, ramblers, and other bank side users, who outnumber anglers by hundreds to one, but are all able to use the ‘facilities’ for free.
Just where is the problem in allowing us to buy a Licence that lasts for twelve months from the day it was issued? Imagine the howls of protest if we all had to get our Road Fund Licences or MOT’s on the same day every year. How about offering us a discount if we bought Rod Licences that last for two or even three years?
Closed Minds?
In the next few days I will be setting off to fish on a river not far from my home. When I get to the fishery in question, I will stop for a chat with the lock keeper as I pick up the key to the gate that allows me access to the Environment Agency controlled fishery, where I will spend a pleasant day river fishing. I have no fear of prosecution, because, apparently, it is perfectly legal to fish for trout with an artificial bait from April 1st, the beginning of the trout season.
I can fish with spinners, minnows, spoons, plugs, flies, whatever, so long as I am fishing for trout. The perch, chub, dace, pike, etc, don’t know this, of course. I don’t particularly want to catch them, but as there are no calendars underwater for them to consult, how could they know they are out of season?
And here is the anomaly about the closed season being applied to rivers. Just as the weather starts to warm up, and boat and bankside activity increases at a frenetic pace, we anglers are unceremoniously chucked off. Do we disturb the fish more than the wash from flotillas of boats cruising up and down from dawn to dusk, in high summer?
Might not something like the Henley Regatta, with its rowing boats thrashing up and down the river, supporters howling encouragement from the banks, empty champagne bottles and Hooray Henrys and Henriettas ending up in the water, cause a little more discomfort to the fish than most anglers could?
Do we climb in and out of the bankside shallows and weed patches that may be the home of this years’ spawn as we fetch sticks and balls that our masters keep throwing away? No, we are guilty of trying to tempt fish who may be engaged in their once a year nuptials. (Although, we have all seen fish jumping the gun and getting down to it before March 14th, and equally those that hang about after June 16th, no chance of a prosecution for them, then?).
Let’s face it, if you were a fish up for a guaranteed shag, the last thing on your mind would be ensuring you grabbed any angler’s bait on the way past to your love tryst.
I am only too well aware of traditions, and of course, June 16th will always have a special meaning to coarse anglers. And there is nothing to stop them still observing that date if they so wish, but isn’t it about time it was optional?
