| KEVIN PERKINS | |
Never mind smelling the flowers, don’t forget to take time out to see the satirical side of fishing life and grab a laugh along the way as well. So here’s a regular column from Kevin Perkins to remind us that life is for laughing at, or taking the p*** out of, whenever we can. |
COMMERCIAL BREAK Well, I bit the bullet the other day and deliberately went fishing for carp. I will admit that I fished at a commercial fishery (Clattercote), and, of course, I took my son, Simon, along as back up. This in itself is amazing, as teenagers are not normally aware that there is such a thing as two 6 o’clocks in one day, so seeing him awake at that time in the morning was a revelation. In addition, depriving youngsters of electronic stimuli such as X-Box, PS2, iPods, the Internet, or a selection of endearing love songs performed by the likes of Eminem or 50 Cent, preferably played at plaster cracking bass levels is almost certainly a breach of their Human Rights. And as for taking them outside and filling their lungs with the most toxic substance known to teenagers – fresh air, expect a personal visit from a bewigged Cherie Blair-Booth.
Despite these perils, I was more than happy to take junior along with me, for the following reasons: 1)If we didn’t catch anything it was because I was too busy teaching him Anyway, we arrived early and due to a couple of matches being pegged on the nearside bank, chose to start the batting around the middle of the dam wall, where there was plenty of fish activity on the surface. Soon after setting up, another dad/lad combination turned up and mentioned they had great sport on their last trip, which certainly boosted confidence. They also confirmed that Baggin’ Waggler was the preferred line of attack, so that, coupled with white chocolate boilie as the killer bait, we cleared the decks ready to start hauling them in. After an hour of having the fish doing everything in front of us except take the bait, things got very interesting when I finally latched onto my first ever thirty-pounder from a carp lake. How you tame those initial runs is beyond me, the rod was bent almost double, line singing in the breeze and I had visions of having to pour water over the reel, such were the protestations coming from the clutch. Perhaps foolishly, I had only put on six-pound line; something I was regretting now, as it gave me absolutely no chance of bossing this fight. Two powerful runs, first left, then right, and then, almost inevitably a loud ‘crack’ as the line parted just above the float, and fluttered down onto the surface of the water. I could still see the ‘Baggin’ Waggler’ bobbing around about two feet behind the swan I had inadvertently caught (didn’t I mention that?) My son then casually enquired as to how I was going to retrieve my float, and I casually replied that I would just ask the swan nicely to bring it back when he had finished with it. As I was applying my mind to that problem, one of the Clattercote regulars turned up (the very bloke that sells the ‘Baggin’ Wagglers”), and I mentioned the swan/float problem. At this point he very kindly replied he would ‘sort it out’ later with a ‘special bit of kit’ he had in his van, as we didn’t want to get that RSPCA lot involved, did we? I was intrigued, and wondered if this special kit involved a mallet, a sack and a spade, perhaps…
Back to the fishing, and the Bag/Wag man set up beside us, and for an hour or so, using identical tackle, achieved with the exact same results as us – nothing! The match boys had also turned up, and at their ‘all-in’ proceeded to pepper the lake with Bag/Wags too. Morning turned to afternoon and apart from a couple of fish to the match boys, nothing was happening. Junior and I decided to move over to the far bank, and Bag/Wag man set off to sort out the swan, which along with the rest of his family had wisely gone off to the far end of the lake. A change of tactics to the method feeder brought the same avoidance from the fish. Bag/Wag man came round and told us that the match boys were struggling, a couple had tried to fish ‘under the boards’ and had lost and broken pole sections for their troubles. He was carrying his landing net handle with some form of hook attachment on the end, so I asked about the swan/float scenario. “Got it back no problem” he said, “gave it to the youngster, just as they were packing up, he was very pleased” I pointed out that as it was actually my brand new float he had given away and therefore I was sure the lad was chuffed to get it. Bag/Wag man went off muttering that all lads/dads look the same to him. Getting near to going home time, I could still see fish topping 30-40 yards away, so out came the floating dog biscuit, didn’t have a controller, so a Bag/Wag float got a bankside conversion, and out it went. In true textbook style, five casts produced four runs and two fish. The first I landed at around 3-4lbs and then with the second fish I hooked, I gallantly handed the rod to Simon for him to bring in. This one turned out to be a better fish, in the 7-8lb bracket, I suppose. Trouble is, now we both want to go back, quite infectious, this carp fishing lark!
Now, I am slightly annoyed that along with every other angler there, we chose to fish the accepted way (Bag/Wag) and remained blinkered as to what was obviously happening right in front of our eyes. The fish were feeding on the top, any half-decent match angler should/would have seen that, and got the floating pellet/dog biscuit out straight away. Is this something endemic to commercials in that people stick with the tried and tested, and if it don’t work, the fish are to blame, not the tactics? As for the carp being under the boards, apart from it being a perfect bolt hole, is there something attracting them there – perhaps bait manufacturers might want to produce a black boilie with a wiggly tail, or am I assuming too much to think that tadpoles might feature on the carp’s menu? PS: You can now see why I don’t write fishing reports………. |
