There’s Nowt So Funny As Fishermen

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Stuart Dennis

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Or we could take a look at the preparation side of fishing form Cakeys point of view:

- Why you should take sea reels (multipliers) to a venue that’s less than an acre!
- Why you should leave your net and carp mat at home!
- Why you should abuse other anglers and leave your fishing partner to sort it out for you!
- Why it’s important to sit so close to your rods! (about 45 foot away)
- Why you should cast into your next door neighbours swim!
- Why you should not take any food for a days fishing! (when you can ponce off of others)
- Why you should wear bed slippers at the side of a water!

And the hits just keep on coming!
 
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Cakey

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point 1 -You told me we was fishing a huge lake ,should of known it was a wind up ,it was 1/8 of an acre.
point 2-there was not room on the bank fo 2nets and 2 unhooking mats.
point 3-The lake aint 45 foot long, if Id of been 45 foot away Id of been fishing it from Gravesend high street.
point 4- there were no neighbours only room for 2 of us.
point5-very nice thank you!
point 6- they were yours!!
 
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Stuart Dennis

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Thank you Cakey for your defensive reply! I think its extremely honourable that you are big enough to show the error of your ways. As I said to you off line, I’ll start a thread shortly to help gather support for your issues.

I’ll try and raise a few quid from the members on here so we can buy you some new shoes, a net and mat, appropriate reels for the job and of course a meal or two in Burger King.

As you know I’m a good guy, so don’t be so proud next time mate as I’m always happy to make you a sandwich to keep you going. I’ll also see if I’ve got any old cardboard boxes for you to sleep in when we fish our 72 hour session in April.

I’m sure Ron would be happy to contribute his cardigan too. Cakeys obviously being a bit shy in coming forward here guys so if you have any hand-me-downs, he’d truly appreciate any help you can give! Right Cakey!
 
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Rodney Wrestt

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Heh Heh HEh, it was getting far to friendly between you two...that's more like it. Glad to hear you both caught and played nice. ;o}~
 
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Carp Angler

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Having made the aquaintance of both of these........'people' then I think I am able to pass comment on them (as much as I'd prefer to pass water on them)

Stuart prefers the more intimate venue as he is severly limited on his casting ability on the larger venues as his new bream rods aren't really up to the task of whacking a 3oz lead any distance.

His abuse at unknown passers by stems from his strict upbringing at a catholic nunnery in Billericay, where the local school kids would pelt him with rotted fruit as he awaited his lambastment whilst secured in the stocks.

David (or Cakey) has more urgent needs and suffers from penis envy, as can be seen from his over compensation with his purchase of the longest heaviest rods.
His ferret juggling career came to an abrupt halt in a packed town hall in Putney when one of the ferrets burst his over full colostomy bag and his entertainers permit was revoked.
He now leads a sedentary lifestyle only occasionally stirring to beg food from startled shoppers at his local Tescos.

I hope this has given you an insight into these would be helpers and you are better able to judge any future advice that they offer.
 
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Mike Fidler

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oh my, another pair of old gits in the making. Before you know it, they'll be cooking there own chips at the bankside and screaming nearrrghh! at each other.
 
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Cakey

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Stuart dont fall for this one Ive worked it out anagram of Mike Fidler is "idle Rik FME"
 
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Mike Fidler

Guest
Nah, it's not big Rik, in fact I'm bigger than him in every department apart from his head and his feet! lol.
 
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